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The drunk of the Irish

You awake to find yourself in the woods at night.
It starts off a lot like last time:
after a night of wild partying,
you retreat to the only place where
you won’t wake up with a headache: nature.
But here there are no dead deer
carcasses next to you.
And the moon is hardly smiling.
And it is still dark.

Feel confused.
You must have been
really blackout hammered,
perhaps since early afternoon,
since the sun still hasn’t
moved through the horizon.
Also, your lovely swath of nature is a little
bizarre, you realize in a daze.
Maybe you’re hallucinating, but
you can make out a scene straight
from the pages of folklore,
and not the sunshine and rainbows leprechaun
craziness of today, but the creepiness
of long ago before televisions took away
Imagination.

Feel disoriented.
A fire burns brightly behind you and you
take the time to let your eyes adjust.
With pupils dilated, you find
an old sage twirling
in the blaze.
The man giggles and dances about
the light like a wily fox.
Cunning in his tricks, but predictable,
he asks your name.
Reply the same and he will give you a token.
He tells you not to trade it for anything.
Hypocrite.

Feel smug.
You want to play it in a casino
to maybe win more tokens,
but you don’t know where you’d redeem them
and there isn’t a slot machine in sight.
You decide to try your luck at a pub.
Even in the wilderness,
one is surprisingly easy to find.
You ask what the coin will buy you
while slapping it on the table.
The barkeep replies “the memory
of your mother holding you.”

Feel oddly moved.
You say, “I’ll have one of those,
But hold the lime, I’m allergic.”
He serves it to you in a
wooden cup with a clover garnish atop.
It tastes a little like roofies.
Wait, that isn’t right,
this is how it started last time.
You awake to find yourself in the woods at night.

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One thought on “The only day where 11:00 am isn’t too early for a beer.

  1. Thanks for the chuckles… Another place where 11:00 isn’t too early for a beer, is when you’ve just pulled a 24 hour shift… Though not a good idea.
    Very creative poem- I had to read it twice to catch all that was in there- Loved it!

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